The Best Available
October 2, 2012 by Ben Crystal
As I have shuffled through my mortal coil, I have had the privilege of building friendships with a wide variety of folks. Admittedly, most of them share my view of the world; but some not only donâ€™t share my starboard lean, they list quite sharply to port. Among them is a fellow who is not only most decidedly not a conservative, heâ€™s not even an American. (He wears his maple leaf with marked pride.) Yet heâ€™s one of the wiser and more impressively politically thoughtful human beings I have ever known.
During one of our regular discussions on the Cirque Du Crazy that has replaced the traditional American electoral process, he posited that Mitt Romneyâ€™s failure to truly inspire conservatives precludes a victory in November. Given the slavish devotion Democrats offer to current President Barack Obama, itâ€™s easy to dismiss Romney for the lack of similar zeal he elicits from the right side of the spectrum.
Romney doesnâ€™t inspire conservatives to shout their assent because Romney isnâ€™t a conservative. Thus, while Democrats ignore the crimes and misdemeanors that define Obamaâ€™s occupation of our Oval Office and shriek their support for Obama (and against God) across the slums, cemeteries and shuttered coal mines created by their idolâ€™s incompetence, the noise from the other side is decidedly muted. Yet it doesnâ€™t really matter. Obama will lose in November, and his coming Waterloo connects to Romney only because Romney will be the most recognizable beneficiary of Obamaâ€™s self-immolation.
In defense of my friendâ€™s assessment, what was once a peaceful transfer of power admired the world over — especially with Obama ascending as the first â€ścelebrityâ€ť President — is now an anti-intellectual beauty pageant. Think of it:
My nameâ€™s Barry. My turn-ons include golf, hanging with Jay-Z and mom jeans. My turn-offs include the Bill of Rights and Bibi Netanyahu. If Iâ€™m elected, I promise to lie to Congress (Accomplice General Eric Holder makes that look so easy!), wipe out the middle class and party like a rock star on your nickel.
Throw in an awkwardly performed dance routine and Honey Boo Boo might have a shot at the White House. Sheâ€™s easily as qualified as Obama.
In the interest of full disclosure, Iâ€™m hardly an ardent admirer of Romney. However, with the departure of Ron Paul from the Presidential stage and the reality (go easy, Libertarian Party; Iâ€™m just being honest) that Gary Johnson is as likely to win this fall as an unborn baby is to escape a Planned Parenthood â€śclinicâ€ť unharmed, I find myself east of the intellectual rock and west of the electoral hard place. And Iâ€™m hardly the only resident of Godâ€™s Little Political Acre.
Romney isnâ€™t going to win in November because Republicans unified behind him in a manner similar to the Democratic phalanx that guards Obama. The membership of the modern Republican Party, unconstrained by the infantile intellectual deficiencies of liberalism and spread across a much more diverse ideological plane, lacks the guilelessness required to worship at the altar of some mere politician. Liberals will ignore failure to vote for the guy with the â€śDâ€ť after his name; most of them — proud members of the 47 percent — donâ€™t and wonâ€™t know better.
I and my fellow wanderers in the desert of Presidential disappointment may not share the blindly religious fervor of Obamaâ€™s average supporters, but we do possess the unshakeable will to see an end to the four years of shame Obama has delivered to us all. Indeed, as I told my Canadian pal, Obama is going to be the first President since Herbert Hoover to lose an election via what amounts to a nullification vote. Millions of Americans who lack confidence in Romney will vote for him anyway, simply because he isnâ€™t Obama. And in an America torn virtually asunder by Obamaâ€™s failures foreign and domestic, that may well be good enough.