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Romney Reads Letterman Top 10

NEW YORK, Dec. 20 (UPI) — Republican presidential contender Mitt Romney visited the “The Late Show with David Letterman” in New York to address the “American people.”

Romney made a special guest appearance on Monday night’s show to read off the top 10 “Things Mitt Romney Would Like to Say to the American People,” starting with No. 10: “Isn’t it time for a president who looks like a 1970s game show host?”

No. 9: “What’s up, gangstas — it’s the M-I-Double-Tizzle.”

No. 8: “I have no proof, but I have a feeling Canada is planning something.”

No. 7: “Actually, I’m only here to meet Tom Cruise.”

No. 6: “Live from New York, it’s Saturday Night!!!”

No. 5: “My new cologne is now available at Macy’s. It’s ‘Mitt-stified.'”

No. 4: “I just used all my campaign money to buy a zoo with Matt Damon.”

No. 3: “I can do a lot, but even I can’t fix the Indianapolis Colts.”

No. 2: “Newt Gingrich? Really?”

No. 1: “It’s a hairpiece.”

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