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Outside the Asylum


Giving Peace No Chance

In 2009, the Norwegian Nobel Committee awarded the annual Nobel Peace Prize to newly minted President Barack Obama. In its press release, the Committee noted “his extraordinary efforts to strengthen international diplomacy and cooperation between peoples.”

How To Win Friends And Influence Liberals

Hey there, Democrats. It’s your pal, Ben. I want you to know I feel just awful about the way Representative Anthony Weiner not only lied about his misadventures on Twitter, but used your devotion against you. So I invite you to join us in the conservative ranks.

An Open Letter to Sarah Palin

Your presence in the political arena has raised liberal hysteria to monumental heights. Let’s be honest, ma’am, liberals hate you. And I don’t mean “hate” in the way they hate it when the barista puts too much soy milk in their lattes. I mean “hate” in the way George Soros hates it when President Barack Obama forgets his lines.

The Real Victim

As the killer was led from the courtroom last week, there was no epic roar of outrage from the gallery. As he shuffled down the hallway, only a few reporters made halfhearted attempts to glean some insight. As he stumbled (hindered by the back brace he wears), there were shrieks of neither comfort nor condemnation.

‘Coach’ Obama Loses Big

Imagine, if you will, a football team. It has practiced diligently. It has scouted the opposition exhaustively. It has a loyal, albeit marginally unbalanced, fan base. It has a foolproof game plan. It is ready. Then, it gets on the field and it loses — big. Final score: 97-0. Now, imagine the reaction in the wake of such an epic beat down.

The Smell of Defeat

As the parade of potential Presidents of the United States marches toward 2012, I can’t help but notice there’s a scent on the breeze. Watching the Democrats and the corporate media circle the wagons around their idol, it finally occurred to me what the putrescent odor is: fear.

Israel, For Real…

Give President Barack Obama credit. Having proved himself the most domestic policy-impaired president since Jimmy Carter “lusted in his heart” (if not since Warren Harding got his Teapot Domed), Obama has evidently decided to set his sights overseas. Bad luck for the citizens of our best strategic ally in Middle East.

Savannah’s Vile Visitors

During my older brother’s college years, the Ku Klux Klan planned a march through the sleepy Southern town in which his school tended the delicate young minds in their charge. As the fateful day approached, the college administrators wrung their hands over the best approach to dealing with the potentially explosive mixture of goose-stepping knot heads and a couple thousand college students drunk on school spirit and youthful vigor. 

A Black Mark For The Democrats

Herman Cain is a fascinating subject. A self-made millionaire, Cain is a deeply conservative man who recently announced his intention to seek the 2012 Republican Presidential nomination. Cain is a graduate of “historically black” Morehouse College in Atlanta — the alma mater of famous African-Americans including auteur Spike Lee, actor Samuel L. Jackson, banker Walter Massey and a certain clergyman from Atlanta who made quite a name for himself back in the 1960s civil rights movement — and woe be unto the pundit who denigrates the name of Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. 

If You Can Read This…

So the economy is not exactly hitting on all cylinders of late. Unemployment hovers around the double-digit mark (the Department of Labor says 9 percent; it’s likely higher). The dollar is showing signs of losing its position in the currency market’s starting rotation (even currencies named AFTER ours — the Canadian dollar is one example — are ahead of our dollar in the batting order). And close to 15 percent of our fellow Americans receive government aid of one sort or another.

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