Outside the Asylum
During my older brother’s college years, the Ku Klux Klan planned a march through the sleepy Southern town in which his school tended the delicate young minds in their charge. As the fateful day approached, the college administrators wrung their hands over the best approach to dealing with the potentially explosive mixture of goose-stepping knot heads and a couple thousand college students drunk on school spirit and youthful vigor.
Herman Cain is a fascinating subject. A self-made millionaire, Cain is a deeply conservative man who recently announced his intention to seek the 2012 Republican Presidential nomination. Cain is a graduate of “historically black” Morehouse College in Atlanta — the alma mater of famous African-Americans including auteur Spike Lee, actor Samuel L. Jackson, banker Walter Massey and a certain clergyman from Atlanta who made quite a name for himself back in the 1960s civil rights movement — and woe be unto the pundit who denigrates the name of Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.
So the economy is not exactly hitting on all cylinders of late. Unemployment hovers around the double-digit mark (the Department of Labor says 9 percent; it’s likely higher). The dollar is showing signs of losing its position in the currency market’s starting rotation (even currencies named AFTER ours — the Canadian dollar is one example — are ahead of our dollar in the batting order). And close to 15 percent of our fellow Americans receive government aid of one sort or another.
As George W. Bush entered the stretch run of his 2004 reelection bid, the national unemployment rate hovered around 5.4 percent. Given that any economist worth his slide rule (sit down, Paul Krugman) would agree that 5.4 percent is barely a Joe Biden hair-plug’s breadth above nominal zero, Bush’s economic “strategery” in the years following the lemming-off-a-cliff dive by the tech sector, the housing and construction markets plunging lower than the necklines at a Vegas working-girls convention and the virtual ubiquity of global Islamofascist terrorism was no small accomplishment — especially considering Bush spent taxpayer money like a second wife.
My apologies for rousting you from your post-“bin Laden sleeps with the fishes” reverie (or not, depending on your perspective); but the Democrats are apparently not done with “The Donald.”
This won’t take long, kids. And it won’t be all that funny, either. Last night, as I was polishing a piece on an entirely different topic, the Drudge Report ran the headline. Then CNN began screaming that a Presidential address to the nation was expected for sometime after 10:30 EDT. Without seeming immodest, I knew it was coming. The President — any President — wouldn’t ask for a few moments of our time at that hour except under extremely unusual circumstances.
Last weekend, more than a billion Christians around the world observed the passing of Good Friday and Easter. Well… MOST Christians observed Good Friday and Easter. Rumor has it that some of us were observing the passing of a Good Hangover and/or an Easter discount at the golf course. (Well, that’s what I heard.)
No one ever wrote it down; mostly because common decency dictates that it didn’t need to be written down. No matter what your objection to (insert name of political figure to whom you object here), their kids were always out of bounds.
Truth be told, there are worse choices for the White House; some of whom aren’t even Democrats. It’s not as if the guy has committed murder; as long as you don’t count the intellectual tenor of primetime television—which was on life support anyway. I just think there are some candidates who are a great deal less… cartoonish. So, someone please pull the plug on the Donald Trump experiment.
From time to time your kids “wander off the reservation.” They do things which you verbally deplore, but laugh about with your friends: “back when we did (whatever you just grounded your brat for), we didn’t get caught.”