The Consensus Of Dunces

If the United States were to enact a new minimum wage of $10.10 per hour, then the people would subsequently enjoy a higher standard of living. If you don’t believe me, then take it from President Barack Obama. During his State of the Union address last month, our beloved bringer of jobs, quality healthcare and a general sense of fulfillment said a 40 percent boost in the minimum wage is “… not going to depress the economy, it’ll boost the economy.”

And Obama would know. After all, in his five years at the national helm, the unemployment rate has declined from just north of 7 percent all the way down to… just south of 7 percent. I presume that represents the “hope” portion of Obama’s original campaign. As for “change,” the actual number of Americans not working for any wage — minimum or otherwise — opened Year Six of the Obama Era at an all-time high of 91.8 million. Lest you think that can be attributed to the growth in the American population as a whole, the Labor Participation Rate — the working portion of the population — has dipped to 62.8. That’s the worst performance since President Jimmy Carter’s “malaise.”

Having established the First Community Organizer’s impressive economic acumen, there’s no reason to doubt his claims. Of course, raising the minimum wage to $10.10 per hour would move the millions of Americans who can’t afford their own private Oregonian golf courses and/or Martha’s Vineyard beachfront manors into the penthouse next to Jay-Z and Beyonce. We know this because Obama says so — and Obama built an eight-figure fortune on a career as a professional politician, which is pretty remarkable.

But Obama is not alone in cheerleading for a minimum wage hike. Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid joined Obama’s war on the private sector. Tuesday, the fabulously wealthy Reid tweeted:

And if Reid doesn’t convince you of the need for a minimum wage hike with his spirited indictment of private citizens who have violated no laws, even the ones about bid-rigging and nepotism-based conflicts of interest, you should take him at his word anyway. Because Reid’s own economic resume is unimpeachable. He’s been a professional politician since the day he graduated from law school. So there!

Not everyone seems sold on the idea that a minimum wage hike will make us all healthier, wealthier and wiser. According to the Congressional Budget Office, giving America’s minimum-wage workers a Federally mandated raise will send at least an extra 500,000 Americans to the already historically swollen unemployment lines. When the CBO noted the likely outcome of Obama’s wage-hike push, Obama surrogate Jason Furman decried their findings, claiming the CBO estimate “… goes outside the consensus view of economists when it comes to the impact of the minimum wage on employment.” The CBO is just a nonpartisan Federal agency that exists solely to track, record and predict economic data based on empirical evidence and actuarial analysis. What do the bean counters at the CBO know? They’re just professional bean counters. Obama has a “consensus.” Pay no attention to the fact that Obama also had a “consensus” on throwing taxpayer money at Solyndra, General Motors and Mexican drug gangs.

This is actually fairly simple supply and demand stuff, kids. Artificially jack up the cost, and people will find ways to work with less. Despite leftist claims to the contrary, applying basic economic principles to labor isn’t tantamount to the old “apples and oranges” rubric. Ultimately, there is no difference between labor and apples. Arbitrarily hike the price of an apple, and people will buy fewer apples. Arbitrarily hike the price of labor, and employers will hire fewer laborers. Actually, the law of supply and demand has a “necessity is the mother of invention” clause. Arbitrarily hike the price of apples, and people will buy fewer apples. Arbitrarily hike the price of labor, and someone will invent a robot to replace the laborer at 10 percent of the cost.

The proposed wage hike, which would actually join Obamacare and amnesty for illegal aliens in Obama’s arsenal of economy-killing super weapons, represents unsound economics backed by severely flawed understanding of the Constitutional separation of powers. Obama claims to have a “consensus.” I have a consensus, as well, Mr. President: The overwhelming majority of American voters can’t stand you. Try this artificial minimum wage hike, and my consensus will grow by at least a half million people.

–Ben Crystal

‘Gong Show’ Politics

I swear “The Gong Show” offered better talent. At the very least, it wasn’t anywhere near as deliberately insulting to the audience. And Chuck Barris’ claims of service in the CIA were far more believable than nearly anything President Barack Obama and/or his Democrat accomplices might offer. Also, no one on the Gong Show ever killed anyone and then pretended it didn’t happen; nor do I recall any of the “gong-ees” accusing the semi-celebrity “judges” of racism for ringing the gong.

Literally nothing Obama and his accomplices say can be taken on faith. You’d be better off trying to scare a confession out of an Afghan heroin mule. They’ve given up any pretense of honesty. And I’m not just describing their tendency toward the kind of “big lie” politics that would make Joseph Goebbels blush like a schoolgirl. To be sure, multitrillion-dollar frauds like Obamacare provide plenty of glitz. When the President of the United States balances his signature scheme on a bald-faced lie that the Democrats have ceased acknowledging, that’s a full term’s work in and of itself. The mere fact that Obama and his accomplices continue to push something that both the perpetrator and the victim know to be a con tells us everything we need to know about the type of people who have taken over the port-side political party.

But that doesn’t mean they’re not perfectly willing to provide more proof. And when I say “provide more proof,” I mean they actively make liars of themselves on a regular basis. Indeed, if you need someone to expose Obama as a liar, give him time and he’ll do it for you.

Obama recently pushed Congress into betraying the Nation by again raising the debt ceiling. I suppose we were expected to ignore the sage advice of a certain former “community organizer” turned Senator from Illinois turned Presidential debt pimp:

The fact that we are here today to debate raising America’s debt limit is a sign of leadership failure. It is a sign that the US Government cannot pay its own bills… Washington is shifting the burden of bad choices today onto the backs of our children and grandchildren. America has a debt problem and a failure of leadership. Americans deserve better.

And Obama’s recent announcement that he intended to step up his habit of ruling by fiat seems particularly peculiar when compared to his Royal Highness’ own statement decrying such unseemly abuse of executive authority:

The biggest problems that we’re facing right now have to do with George Bush trying to bring more and more power into the Executive Branch and not go through Congress at all, and that’s what I intend to reverse when I’m president of the United States of America.

They called Benghazi a “phony scandal.” I feel comfortable saying that the families of the four victims of that disgraceful, and disgracefully mishandled, disaster were less than pleased to learn the President of the United States officially believes it didn’t happen. The idea that Obama would not only fail to act on his countrymen’s behalf, but then would lie about the causes and responses, continues to be one of the stains that will forever mar Obama’s legacy.

To the wandering liberal who happens upon today’s column, I suppose my words might seem like beating a dead jackass. To those benighted souls, I’ll let a more respected President than Obama will ever be do the talking:

(G)overnments are instituted among men, deriving their just powers from the consent of the governed. That whenever any form of government becomes destructive of these ends, it is the right of the people to alter or abolish it.

And if that doesn’t convince anyone, consider the equally sage advice of Barris: “Gong. Get off the stage.”

–Ben Crystal

Obamacare: Because He Can

So President Barack Obama has delayed the implementation of his pride and joy. Why did Dear Leader decide to park another segment of his namesake in the bureaucratic garage? Why did Obama put his signature rabbit back in the hat? Why did Obama move unilaterally to hold off on the governmental takeover of healthcare provision that he and his accomplices guaranteed would make every one of us happier, healthier, younger, taller and/or more attractive to the hottie in accounting, for the second time?

According to the man himself, he did it because he can. During a tour of Monticello with French President François Hollande, Obama quipped to reporters, “I can do whatever I want.” That might have been a real howler if Obama had not, at that moment, actually been planning to do whatever he wanted regarding Obamacare. As of Monday, Obama plans to hold off on imposing the terms of servitude until 2015, the second time he has decreed such a delay.

Don’t get overheated, though. Like virtually every other delay, exemption and/or clarification beforehand, this latest amnesty doesn’t apply to common rubes like you, Marty Middle Class. Unless you’re somebody Obama considers important (like a union thug, “community organizer” or a member of Senator Harry Reid’s staff), you’re not getting out of the biggest scam in human history that easily.

This latest “delay” applies only to select employers. After passing a bill without letting anyone read it beforehand, Obama then handed out exemptions to his cronies like after-dinner mints. All the cool kids got them. The total roster of exempt groups reads like the AFL-CIO’s membership directory. Joining the union thugs on the invite list to Obama’s taxpayer-funded Obamacare-exemption hoedown:

  • Corporate mega-giants like PepsiCo, a fact at odds with the Democrats’ “champions of the middle class” routine.
  • StarTek, a company that cheerfully describes itself as “a global provider of business process outsourcing (BPO) services.” That’s a fancy way of saying: “When your call to customer service is answered by a Filipino who speaks English as well as you speak Tagalog, that’s us.” Should you score the double hammy of both losing the coverage Obama promised you could keep and losing your job as one of the 2.5 million Obamacare casualties, StarTek helped replace you with Manuel in Manila.
  • I can only assume the first lady’s professed affinity for burritos led to the exemption for Uncle Julio’s Fine Mexican Food restaurants.
  • And I would dearly love to hear the explanation behind the exemption of the tobacco wholesaler Alliance One. Perhaps it’s part of the supply chain leading to the cigarettes Obama still secretly smokes in between statements on the evils of smoking cigarettes.

There are hundreds more exemptees, including a number of law firms whose only qualification appears to be generous donations to Obama. Someone is going to have to foot the bill for Obama’s Obamacare exemption party. And that someone is definitely not a member of the Teamsters Local Union 72 Welfare Fund (also exempt).

But you’re not on that list. And you’re not going to be. When Obamacare debuted, the vast majority of you wanted nothing to do with it. As it became readily apparent that virtually every promise Obama made was literally empty, Obamacare’s already-wavering support caved like the Denver Broncos’ defense in the Super Bowl. The rollout was the biggest national embarrassment since Vice President Joe Biden’s last visit to a 7-Eleven. There were exemptions, and then more exemptions. You, I and the family down the street comprise the one group that has yet to receive so much as a sideways glance. Yet we are paying for them. Obama and his Democratic accomplices have no intention of letting John Q. Public off the hook. They can’t. And the only reason Obama has given is, “I can do what I want.”

Here’s the real kicker: It’s illegal. And I’m not referring simply to this latest get-out-of-Obamacare-free card. Obamacare was passed under fraudulent circumstances. Fraud is still illegal. And the President is Constitutionally barred from altering legislation — even bad legislation — on a whim. Deliberately violating Article 1, Section 1 of the Constitution is illegal. And the exemptions create legal inequalities, certainly violating the 14th Amendment. That’s an extra-illegal burger with lettuce and cheese. You’ll eat it, and you’ll like it. Why? Because Obama says so, and he can do whatever he wants.

–Ben Crystal

Dasvidanya, Obama!

As Olympic openings go, I suppose Sochi’s could have been weirder. Athletes and visitors discovered the Black Sea beach town lacked creature comforts like floors, windows and working doors. Others learned the tap water was almost dirty enough to warrant a commercial starring a tearful Sally Struthers, promising: “For the cost of your morning latte, you could protect thousands of elite athletes from confusing southern Russia for northern Mexico.” And of course, major elements of the production worked as well as a Ukrainian nuclear power plant. It is Russia, after all.

Not long after the Russian TV producers somehow managed to convince President Vladimir Putin that the mega-snowflake-to-Olympic-rings trick hadn’t bombed like an overweight ski jumper, the U.S. Olympians made their entrance. Given our less-than-cordial relationship with the Russians of late, I wouldn’t have been stunned if the well-below-capacity crowd booed our squad — or at least fired off that weird hissing thing they do at sports Americans don’t watch on television. But they really didn’t seem to care any more about our athletes than they did about the Lithuanians, who have demonstrated much more backbone in dealing with Vlad the President.

Of course, much of the rest of the world obviously doesn’t like us. And who can honestly blame them? We obviously don’t care about them. We’re embarrassing, and I don’t mean in the “ugly, arrogant American” sense with which we used to be viewed. I mean in the “these guys have lost their marbles” sense.

Under the regime of President Barack Obama, the United States has progressed from fighting against al-Qaida from Afghanistan to the Maghreb to sending al-Qaida care packages to Syria from the Maghreb. We’ve gone from interning foreign detainees at Gitmo to interning foreign detainees at Gitmo. When islamofascists murdered four Americans in Benghazi, Libya, we blamed the crime on a YouTube video almost no one had ever seen. Susan Rice lied to Congress and got promoted. Hillary Clinton lied to Congress about the same thing and will almost certainly be the Democrats’ Presidential nominee in 2016. And the Democratic Party, whose number includes our commander in chief, spends more time calling their fellow citizens “terrorists” than they do calling the actual terrorists “terrorists.”

We’re not even nice to our friends anymore. Obama’s choice to be Ambassador to Argentina, a deep-pockets political consultant named Noah Bryson Mamet, admitted during his Senate confirmation hearings that he’s never visited the country to which he will now represent American interests. At least he knows where Argentina is located. Obama recently sold the post of United States Ambassador to Norway to a campaign bundler named George Tsunis. During his confirmation hearing, Tsunis, who paid $500,000 for the posting, essentially revealed that he struggles to find Norway on a map of Scandinavia.

Last summer, Putin made Obama cower like a teenage girl in a slasher movie. The Chinese are pulling ahead of us on the world stage. The Iranians are now mocking Obama on Twitter with jokes about “Rouhanicare.” Even the North Koreans are laughing at us.

The Russians can’t successfully finish the plumbing in time for an Olympic Games despite a seven-year head start. In fact, Russia is downright Third World when it comes to almost any reasonable standards. Things don’t work right in Russia, with the exception of treachery and potato liquor. Yet the Sochi Games serve as a stern reminder: Russia might be Third World, but we’re definitely third place in the world these days.

Kelo Forever

In 2005, a property-rights case made its way to the U.S. Supreme Court. Entitled Kelo v. City of New London, the case represented the last-ditch attempt by a small group of middle-class Americans to save their middle-class homes from an eminent domain seizure. Led by a nurse and single mother named Suzette Kelo, none of the six plaintiffs was the sort to spend a lot of time in the highest court in the land. And their opponents made the case an almost blatant metaphor for David and Goliath. Standing opposite the everyman plaintiffs was the city of New London, Conn. And standing behind New London was the pharmaceutical giant Pfizer. Thanks to a sweetheart deal proffered by a city nearly desperate for incoming capital, Pfizer was the incoming tenant of a tract of land just across the water from the Kelo homestead.

In the eternally infamous decision, the court’s liberal wing ruled in favor of the government-industrial complex. At the time, the decision sparked a brushfire of outrage amongst the politically active segment of the population; but the blaze was unable to breach the walls of American indifference. Of course, the Kelo decision hardly marked the first time our government stepped on our fellow citizens’ necks. But Kelo represented a new low. Kelo wasn’t a ruling extending freedom. Kelo was a ruling that specifically limited freedom. And it didn’t take place back in the days before 24-hour news channels and 24-second news cycles. Kelo happened against the backdrop of the Internet age. And we ignored it.

The court had not entertained an “eminent domain” case for more than 20 years. With Kelo, for the first time since the dawn of the digital age, the government blatantly abrogated the Bill of Rights — specifically the 5th Amendment’s Takings Clause — on behalf of the promise of corporate cash; and the people let them get away with it. Moreover, the government-industrial complex conclusively learned that outrage, even over the most egregious crimes the State might commit, has a definitive shelf life.

In the most recent edition of The Weekly Standard, writer Charlotte Allen presented ‘Kelo’ Revisited.” Allen reveals the postscript to the Kelo group’s heartbreaking saga is sadder than Justin Bieber in the county lockup’s general population. After years of legal warfare, crippling financial losses, endless hours of time and effort, the city of New London and its accomplices have turned Kelo, et al.’s homes into… nothing.

There’s nothing there. The land deemed so prime for a conference/condo/recreational/retail/riverwalk/tourist trap/airbrushed T-shirt mega-center remains little more than scrub pine and seagulls. Pfizer ended up canceling its expansion plans and left New London with nary a little blue pill as a parting gift. The construction company hired to develop the seized land failed to secure financing and hightailed it back to Boston. Government wanted Kelo’s land. Government got it. And then government left it sitting there. In the Kelo context, government is a spoiled baby — albeit a spoiled baby whose tantrums can involve drone strikes.

And we’re still paying for it in spades. Kelo was the go code for government to roll heavy across our Constitutional landscape. From Kelo came the unmitigated gall of every fraudulent, crony-capitalist, government abuse of power since. The bank and auto bailouts, the “green” energy scams, the gunrunning disasters, the terrorism cover-ups, the domestic spying, the Internal Revenue Service bullying and Obamacare all got their green lights from Kelo.

I might be overestimating Kelo’s import. Perhaps Allen caught me on a particularly impressionable day. But I can’t help but note the striking rise in unapologetic government intrusion into private life in just less than a decade since. Nine years after Kelo, a simple land-grab seems almost quaint.

–Ben Crystal

Scary Gunz R Scary!

Witness the sad decline of ABC News’ aging newsmagazine 20/20. While it never achieved the notability of 60 Minutes, it likewise never dove headfirst into the deep end of the crazed activism of its neighbors like Dateline NBC. But then last week, 20/20 served up “Young Guns.”

“Young Guns” included the usual worn-out pseudo-facts which turn up in every anti-Bill of Rights phlegm the left coughs up. Co-host Diane Sawyer put on her very best Emmy™-nominee voice to claim “7,391 children rushed to the hospital every year with those gun injuries.” Many of those “children” are 18-20 years of age; and nearly 4,600 of them are the victims of violent and gang-affiliated crime in “gun-free” paradises like Chicago and Washington, D.C. And the appearance of a hackneyed phrase like “gun injuries” betrays the already obvious intent of “Young Guns.” Much like “gun murders,” “gun crime” or the ubiquitous “gun violence,” “gun injuries” is literally designed solely to add a sinister tone to firearms; as if being shot represents a crueler fate than being thrown off a cliff, or bored to death by an endless loop of Attorney General Eric Holder trying to explain the Constitutionality of President Barack Obama’s rule-by-fiat.

“Young Guns” does make a passing mention of the NRA’s “Eddie the Eagle” gun safety program; although merely to dismiss its efficacy. In fact, the so-called experiments designed to expose Eddie’s limitations were as academically worthless as Al Gore teaching the Common Core syllabus. ABC producers left firearms in classrooms; where they stand out like Michael Moore at the salad bar. They even hid them among toys and candy.

In order to demonstrate the dangers of leaving firearms in weird places to which kids have access, ABC hid guns in some weird places to which kids had access; and HOLY CRAP! The kids noticed the guns! See! Proof! Guns ARE like, SUPER-BAD, OMG!” At least the NRA attempts to educate children about gun safety; a far sight better than ABC’ ignorant fear mongering. Ultimately, “Young Guns” sets out to prove “guns + kids = bad” (or whatever); but ends up proving unsupervised liberals + kids = potential disaster.

But 20/20’s self-debasement pales in comparison to the low-rent sideshow antics of State Senator Kevin DeLeon (D-Calif.). During a press conference to introduce Senate Bill 808, DeLeon held up a firearm and whined “This..’ghost gun’ has the ability with a .30 caliber clip to disperse, um, 30 bullets within half a second. 30 magazine clips in half a second.” If DeLeon thinks the “Ghost gun” is bad, wait until he gets a load of the “Phantasmo-Gun” with the optional IR-double-unicorn-magnetoscopic-sight-O-matic in Eleventy-four caliber with a the 17 Gajigaquillion clip-zine!

Time after time, the left attempts to subvert a God-given right deemed so important by the Framers that they listed it secondonly to the right to free expression. Time after time, their shocking ignorance shoots their own logic to pieces. Time after time, not only do their efforts rebound off the bulwarks of truth and liberty, their supposed gun-free utopias report murder and violent crime statistics comparable to one of those third world cities where they burn American flags while wearing Chicago Bulls jerseys.

“Young guns” might as well have been entitled “Scary Gunz R Scary.” ABC News might as well be retitled “TV time at Kevin DeLeon’s office.” And Diane Sawyer might as well retire.

-Ben Crystal

Snowmagedopocalypse 2014: State Of The Union

At least, that’s what I’m hoping Michael Bay will select as a title when they make a big-budget blockbuster based on the true events of this fateful day. As I’m writing this, the fair-haired maiden city of the South, Savannah, Ga., is under imminent threat of a winter storm the likes of which hasn’t been seen outside those global-warming-run-amok movies in which the irascible old veteran climatologist/ninja braves impossible odds to rescue his estranged son from… winter.

There’s no shortage of irony in a looming snowstorm belting the Deep South on the same night President Barack Obama will likely announce executive orders to combat so-called “global warming.” Moments like this make me realize the blissful cocoon of ignorance in which liberals spend most of their lives. To be fair, it’s getting a bit nippy outside. I’m pretty sure I just saw Al Gore over by the bus stop. He was wearing a sign that read: “Will bore you to tears for money.” At least, I think it was Gore. He looked like a man, crossed with a bear, crossed with a pig. He’ll be fine. I noticed he climbs aboard the private jet parked nearby whenever he gets too chilly.

I noticed The Daily Caller’s Jim Treacher suggested a drinking game for tonight’s festivities:

Hmm… Nah. It’s a dirty job, but someone’s gotta do it. You can’t trust the mainstream media to do it. In fact, if what MSNBC is offering is anything to go by, the talking heads are far too busy hating Representative Michele Bachmann. That’s not really relevant, but neither is MSNBC.

Since I’m already here, and I already made a trip to the liquor store, I guess I’ll endure it.

(Just over an hour later…)

I made a ton of notes during the speech. And then I deleted them. That was the speech he delivered with his political back against the wall? As his party faces an electoral firing squad this fall (largely due to the epic disaster, Obamacare), the heroic President rode to the rescue with… more Obamacare stories. He’s almost as popular as Hillary Clinton in a Benghazi survivors’ reunion, and he wanted to honor the diplomatic corps. The Nation is shivering through more brutal winter weather, and the President says “climate change is a fact.”

What a colossal waste of time. The State of the Union ought to be a rallying cry, a clarion call to energize not only the partisan base, but the entire Nation. Thanks to Obama’s abysmal performance, we’re collectively facing a new national nightmare. Rather that proffer hope, President Change served up a steaming pile of the same old stuff. It didn’t even snow in Savannah. I should have taken Treacher’s advice.

–Ben Crystal

The Liberal List

Last week, as the career of Texas State Senator Wendy Davis slammed into the bridge abutment of political reality, I couldn’t help but notice the liberal establishment racing to the scene of the accident. Despite the fact that she’d been caught lying like a Democrat testifying under oath, her supporters were unfazed. According to the left, Davis was a victim of evil conservative sexism. In much the same vein as countless other exposed liberal liars beforehand, the fact that Davis fabricated some pretty major chapters in her personal biography was immaterial to our Democratic friends. As I’ve said before (and will sadly be forced to say again), it’s not that Democrats lack principle; it’s just that politics is their principle. And Davis is hardly the only person the left has handed a free pass. Take a look at the left’s partisan pantheon. Then join me in asking: Who the hell are these people? Not every major leftist player is here. But each represents a large swath of the teeming horde beneath them. They’re not just typical; they’re archetypes.

Liberal VIP: Barack Obama

Actually, Barack Obama almost didn’t make the list. It’s not that I’m downplaying his ability to effect change for the worse; it’s just that Obama is actually fairly unremarkable. For all his self-important bloviating, Obama is nothing more than the latest actor to step into the starring role in one of humanity’s longest-running dramas: the tyranny of the few. Measured against the others who have held top billing, Obama is an understudy in the touring company. Even if his signature “accomplishment” hadn’t turned out to be the shuffling zombie of Obamacare, Obama is poised to go down in history as the most unpopular two-term President of all time. And that’s about all he’s got. Josef Stalin, Mao Zedong and Adolf Hitler killed far more people. The Islamofascists have more money. Former President Bill Clinton lied more convincingly. The Kims of North Korea have more interesting friends and are — reputedly — vastly superior golfers. Russian President Vladimir Putin looks less pathetic shirtless.

Liberal VIP: Hillary Clinton

After all the wild fantasies about a supposed “vast right-wing conspiracy,” there’s really only one lesson Hillary Clinton’s continued influence teaches us: In order to be classified as a “strong woman” by the soy latte set, you have to let the boys do all the heavy lifting.

Liberal VIP: Bill Clinton

While the rest of the liberal pantheon features the same smug, entitled twerps for whom skinny jeans and “hipster” glasses were invented, “Bubba” stands out like Rosie O’Donnell at a beauty pageant. Every time some smug, entitled twerp dressed in skinny jeans and hipster glasses bellows the “war on women” refrain, I think of Bill Clinton fixing the camera with a steely eye and steelier resolve and saying with all the conviction of a sociopath: “I did not have sexual relations with that woman.”

Liberal VIP: Jane Fonda

How Jane Fonda keeps resurfacing in the public consciousness mystifies me. A Hollywood princess grew into a marginally talented actress who looked good in small clothing. Rather than slink off into the twilight years of “Love Boat” guest shots and denture adhesive ads, she built a second career as a remorseless traitor. She shacked up with a couple of leisure-class twerps with obvious personality disorders and enough cash to keep her busy with exercise videos and political shrieking. One of them even let her name their kid after a homicidal terrorist. Fonda is really nothing more than Patty Hearst without the kidnapping. Like Hearst, Fonda’s a poor little rich girl who went off the rails. Unlike Hearst, Fonda willingly bought her ticket to crazy town. And now, first lady Michelle Obama, who wasn’t proud of her country for the first 44 years of her life, considers Little Lady Fonda to be an “engaged, politically savvy, sharp woman.”

Liberal VIP: George Soros

Say hello to the Emperor Palpatine of politics-as-Star Wars. This former-Nazi-collaborator-turned-billionaire puppet master is the Bilderbergs, the Rothschilds and the Kennedys with a side order of James Bond villain. Through fronts like the Open Society Institute, George Soros’ tendrils have wormed their way into the geopolitical strata like metastatic cancer with a revenge complex. The list of hate groups that cash Soros-signed checks is longer than his beneficiary Brett Kimberlin’s rap sheet. ThinkProgress,  Media Matters for America,  Common Cause. All propped up by Soros’ billions and all protected by the tax-exempt status conservative groups can’t sniff without an Internal Revenue Service investigation only slightly more invasive than the inmates at a Turkish prison.

Liberal VIP: Harry Reid

Don’t let his tendency to act like he’s House Minority Leader Nancy Pelosi’s butler fool you. While Pelosi has been demoted by the electorate, Harry Reid remains the Senate Majority Leader — although his perch is getting wobbly. To stretch the Star Wars similes past their breaking point: If Soros is the Emperor, Reid is the spooky-looking demon-faced guy from the first prequel. He’s never going to be the biggest villain in the show, but he’s 100 percent dedicated to trying. Reid “heard” that Mitt Romney didn’t pay his income taxes. I “heard” that Reid is a bid-rigging corruptocrat who took money from disgraced politico Jack Abramoff. Unlike Reid, what I “heard” actually happened.

Liberal VIP: Nancy Pelosi

There’s a reason Nancy Pelosi is the former Speaker of the House. Americans were so appalled by her performance, especially the two abysmal years we endured under the three-headed monstrosity of Pelosi, Reid and Obama in the majority — we actually preferred current Speaker John Boehner. We have to pass it to see what’s in it. We passed it. We saw what’s in it. We like it almost as much as we like you, Mrs. Pelosi.

Liberal VIP: Al Gore

I’m glad this particular Big Tobacco scion found his way in this difficult world. Like so many of the left’s biggest heroes, Al Gore has spent most of his life dining with sterling flatware in the sorts of places where the liberal base isn’t allowed to use the service entrance. The same wooden demeanor that charmed Buddhist monks out of loads of cash beyond the control of legal authority has somehow propelled him into a Nobel, an Oscar and a place in the imaginary scientists’ hall of fame. But the ice- and snow-crusted death throes of so-called “global warming,” easily his defining contribution to history, might have sent lesser men into a tailspin of increasingly bizarre behavior. Under the right stress, he might even have taken to molesting massage therapists. I guess it’s a good thing Qatari oil barons had enough cash to push him out of his pretend news network and into a $500 million dollar retirement.

Liberal VIP: Phil Griffin

Think of Phil Griffin as the junior varsity Roger Ailes. Griffin didn’t invent the faux-journalism his MSNBC charges spew all over the screens, nor does he write the hate-filled invective that they proffer in place of actual news. But Griffin is the guy who continually brings in misogynistic lunatics like Alec Baldwin and Martin Bashir and knockoff hipsters like Rachel Maddow and that cake-eater who looks like a less masculine Maddow. Try to imagine the liberal response if Sean Hannity called a liberal woman a “mashed-up bag of meat” or a “slut.” What if Glenn Beck suggested someone should defecate in a woman’s mouth in response to her opinions or participated in a conspiracy that actually involved smearing feces on a teenaged girl? Now look at the “men” of MSNBC. Liberals love whining about Ailes’ success at FOX News. With guys like Griffin trying to replicate Ailes’ formula without Ailes’ eye for talent, they’d better keep on loving it.

Liberal VIP: Michael Moore

Guys like Michael Moore remind me that liberals set the bar for heroes very, very low. You have to admire his moxie, though. Of all the multimillionaire windbags who turned the so-called “Occupy” riots into marketing opportunities, Moore was easily the most well-fed. Of all the multimillionaires who have pocketed huge piles of money off shlockumentary films entitled “Capitalism: a Love Story,” Moore is… well, he’s the only one. I’m pretty sure he’s also the only multimillionaire who attended $4,000-per-week weight-loss clinics before crowing about the high quality of healthcare available to the tyrannized — and terrorized — people of Cuba. Of course, there are very few people of Moore’s considerable girth in Cuba. Obesity is as difficult to maintain in a starvation-ravaged dictatorship as freedom of expression is in the liberal idea of utopia.

Liberal VIP: Oprah

The great and powerful Oprah rules from atop her Chicago throne. And what an empire she surveys. From her humble beginnings showcasing renegade lesbian cannibals (or whatever), she became as ubiquitous as Coke, McDonald’s and Weight Watchers. Not only does the one-named wonder exert impressive political clout, she can create media sensations of pure will. Dr. Phil, Gayle King and the image of Michelle Obama as a champion of physical fitness are all products of Oprah’s clout. Of course, she has her limits. Hermes still exists, as does James Frey. Meanwhile, O at Home magazine no longer does.

Liberal VIP: Bill Maher

Hey, stand-up comedian: Do that thing where you call conservative women “c*nts” while complaining that conservatives hate woman. Yeah, that never gets old.

Honorable Mention: Al Sharpton, Etc.

Being black in America is tough. If you don’t believe me, ask one of these fine folks: Al Sharpton, Jessie Jackson, Sheila Jackson Lee, etc. They’re barely getting by. In fact, if it weren’t for the scheming of the white man, they might have to cut back on the love children, race-baiting and three-block limo rides. Egads!

Honorable Mention: Debbie Wasserman Schultz

I’m going to assume that Debbie Wasserman Schultz’s behavior stems directly from a reaction to that commercial-grade sludge she slathers all over her head. Every time I see Wasserman Schultz trying to explain away the latest crime perpetrated by the Democrats on the goodly folk of these United States, I can’t help but think: “And I thought Howard Dean was the crazy one.”

Honorable Mention: Joe Biden

The same backroom wire pullers who built an entire cult of personality for a previously unknown “community organizer” from the People’s Republic of Chicago actually settled on Neil Kinnock’s biggest fan as the best choice for a Presidential understudy. Sleep well with that knowledge.

Honorable Mention: (Insert Obnoxious Hollywood Ninny Here)

Actually, we should be glad Hollywood spends so much time pushing leftist causes. Take, for example, Harvey Weinstein who hopes to destroy the 2nd Amendment with a film starring Meryl Streep. And who in Hollywood isn’t green? Without “climate change” conferences, Obama fundraisers and anti-fracking rallies, we’d be subjected to so many more movies about climate change, Obama and fracking.

–Ben Crystal

The 55 Million

America passed a milestone last week, a truly remarkable signpost on our collective societal highway. Just in case some of us nodded off along the way, the Democrats threw a super soiree. Even President Barack Obama took time out of his busy schedule of fraud, theft and vacationing to commemorate the big day. And why wouldn’t he? It’s not every day that the President of the United States gets to wish a happy birthday to an entire industry dedicated to keeping birthdays from happening. That’s right, kiddies, Roe vs. Wade turned 41 years old.

While some people have done more with 41 years than others, it’s hard to imagine many have made the impact with which Planned Parenthood, NARAL, Kermit Gosnell and the rest of the people who inexplicably call themselves “pro-choice” have dented our collective souls in such a relatively short time. Even if one puts aside the enormous political influence exerted by the abortionists’ lobbying efforts and the spectacular amount of money that has risen like a red tide on the port side of American politics, one cannot possibly ignore the abortion lobby’s crowning achievement. In 41 years since Roe vs. Wade, Gosnell and his ilk have killed 55 million people.

Defenders of the abortion industry often claim they wish only to make abortion “safe, legal and rare.” If 55 million abortion victims in just 41 years is their idea of “rare,” I’d be curious to hear how they would characterize “commonplace.”

Pardon the expression, but 55 million is one bloody big number; in fact, it’s this big:

  • 55 million is about one-sixth the population of the United States, regardless of their stance on abortion.
  • 55 million is twice the population of Texas; including State Senator Wendy “Abortion Barbie” Davis.
  • 55 million is every single person in California and New York; including a sizeable number of abortionists and their moral and financial supporters.
  • 55 million is the entire Midwest, including the Democrat-created garden spots of Chicago and Detroit.
  • 55 million is a capacity crowd at nearly every major sporting and entertainment venue in North America.
  • 55 million is twice the number of African-Americans, a group already tragically disproportionately well-represented in abortion statistics.
  • 55 million is more than twice the number of healthcare professionals in the United States, Kermit Gosnell not included.

Lest those statistics not shake you from your reverie, in the 41 years since the Supreme Court green lit the act that violates every law of man, nature and God, the abortion industry has prevented:

  • 55 million births.
  • 55 million first steps.
  • 55 million first words.
  • 55 million first days of school.
  • 55 million first loves.

All those firsts would have been followed by seconds, and then thirds.  To be sure, the joys would have been separated by no shortage of sorrows. More than a few sinners would have accompanied the saints. Some of the 55 million might have changed the world — not all for the better. It’s a bit of a shame we’ll never know.

–Ben Crystal

Wendy’s (Pretend) Wild Ride

I’ve noted in the past that I believe some of our dear Democratic friends choose partisanship over principle. I realize now that I might have undersold the depth of their perversion. It’s more accurate to say that partisanship is their principle. How else to explain the latest clown to jump out of the Democrats’ tiny little car? After all the scandals midwifed into existence by various Democrats’ seemingly reflexive dishonesty, we are now being asked — nay, commanded — to ignore the news that rising leftist star and Texas State Senator Wendy Davis (D-Kermit Gosnell’s fantasies) is almost as legitimate as the love child of President Barack Obama’s “composite girlfriend” and Senator Cory Booker (D-N.J.)’s imaginary pal “T-Bone.”

Davis is the political equivalent of a one-hit wonder. If not for the fact that she’s become the poster girl for the abortion industry (aka “Abortion Barbie”), she’d be little more than a local curiosity (“That State Legislator who wears the pink shoes”). Actually, if not for her full-throated and oddly single-minded support of one of the modern world’s last socially accepted acts of pure barbarism, she’d probably join her conservative sisters as fodder for the misogynist ramblings of the pay-cable comedy set.

But Davis loves abortion, so we’re supposed to overlook the fact that her resume might as well be printed on rainbow paper and include a job as a unicorn wrangler. In fact, the usual suspects on the political port side claim those of us who refuse to play patsy are no better than he-man woman-haters like Martin Bashir or Representative Jim Moran (D-Va.). According to the George Soros-financed, inexplicably tax-exempt hate group Think Progress, noticing Davis’ fabricated resume notes comes straight out of something they call the “classic sexist playbook.” According to Davis, the Dallas Morning News story that turned the spotlight of truth on Davis was actually a ploy by her Lone Star gubernatorial opponent, Texas Attorney General Greg Abbott.

Davis is a Democrat. Thus, she’s sticking to her story even after it’s been exposed as fiction. She’s a figment of her own imagination — or she’s a bona fide sociopath. Either way, calling her critics “sexist” is offensively stupid. I would add that the left wasted so many gender-bias bullets to protect Susan Rice, Hillary Clinton, Kathleen Sebelius, etc. that the ol’ slander-spewer is empty.

The Democrats are also missing a hidden danger here. At a time when the party leader’s credibility is headed south faster than Senator Bob Menendez (D-the Dominican Republic’s less postcard-y spots) on a Cialis bender and when Madame Clinton has already announced her 2016 Presidential bid, the Democrats are gambling that the majority of the electorate either can’t or won’t differentiate between party and principle. Betting the House, not to mention the Senate and White House, that most people are either that stupid or that cravenly partisan seems unwise.

And honestly, it’s bloody Texas. Davis was already running uphill. Her one-note campaign struggles mightily to raise cash from actual Texans. She recently boasted about her supposed $12 million pile, which includes funds raised by similarly anti-life Democratic hate groups like “Battleground Texas” (funds that are not earmarked for any particular candidate). And her 2013 cash-grubbing swing through the Lone Star State came up almost laughably short; Davis raked in a total of $857 from the six largest cities in the Rio Grande Valley. Contrast that paltry sum to the $34,426.35 she bagged in House Minority Leader Nancy Pelosi’s hometown of San Francisco, or the $57,391.84 she pocketed in Manhattan. While I’m sure Davis enjoys rubbing elbows with the well-heeled limousine liberals at Nob Hill and Upper East Side wine-and-cheese gallery openings, her multimillionaire sugar daddies and mommies don’t vote in the Lone Star State.

As if the lying, the fabrications and the obvious disdain for her own home State aren’t enough, Davis has managed to choke herself on her fancy pink sneakers. As the scandal grew, Davis took to Twitter to attack Abbott.

Putting aside the fact that Abbott is not responsible for Davis’s tenuous relationship with the reality, I’m pretty sure he understands “struggle.” He’s been sitting in a wheelchair for 30 years. Moreover, unlike Davis’s purported “struggles,” the wheelchair isn’t imaginary.

He Really Hates Us

Less than a week before the Nation observed Martin Luther King Jr.’s birthday, The New Yorker published a story about President Barack Obama. Editor David Remnick asked the obvious question about Obama’s abysmal approval ratings. Sitting in the shadow of King’s dream of a color-blind society that is united in harmony, Obama played the race card: “There’s no doubt that there’s some folks who just really dislike me because they don’t like the idea of a black President.”

Of course Obama played the race card. Excepting those occasions when the target is someone like Supreme Court Justice Clarence Thomas, former Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice, world-renowned surgeon Ben Carson or some other black person who demonstrated the temerity to allow their accomplishments to speak for themselves, the Democrats default to spurious accusations of racism faster than Texas State Senator Wendy “Abortion Barbie” Davis can shriek “war on women!”

I almost feel bad for our poor President. Facing public approval that is folding faster than Vice President Joe Biden playing Jeopardy!, Obama assumes his detractors must be motivated by what he calls racial animus. It has never occurred to him that his detractors might be motivated by myriad scandals that have come to define his tenure. In Obama’s mind, the Obamacare debacle, the Benghazi murders, unfettered National Security Agency spying on private citizens, politically motivated Internal Revenue Service harassment of innocent taxpayers, Fast and Furious gunrunning to narcoterrorists, and/or the arming of al-Qaida-affiliated Syrians are insufficient to explain the increasing disaffection Obama endures from the electorate.

What a shame that is — not just because it’s dishonest and crass, but because Obama’s tendency to blame racism for everything from political opposition to parking fines reveals a deeper (and actual) animus. This guy simply doesn’t like us.

And Obama is hardly alone. Late last week, New York Governor Andrew Cuomo fantasized about an Empire State free of people who believe in the sanctity of human life. “(C)onservatives who are right-to-life… have no place in the state of New York.” While New York, which has been hemorrhaging population to “red” States over the past few decades, has become increasingly inhospitable to non-liberals, it’s no California. In declaring pro-life citizens to be personae non gratae, Cuomo has essentially given the bum’s rush to the members of his electorate who recognize that there’s more to New York than Manhattan, the Hamptons and the Governor’s mansion. While Cuomo didn’t identify racism as a factor, there’s no mistaking his clear distaste for the millions of people who think life begins before you’re eligible for union membership.

This liberal hatred for the overwhelming majority of their fellow countrymen and women begs a question. In the case of Obama: What kind of man ascends to the highest office in the land despite absolutely despising half the population? For that matter, what kind of man would want to spend the loftiest moments in his career — indeed, his life — in a job that requires he interact with 150 million people (more like 190 million of late) whom he hates more than Martin Bashir (and pretty much every liberal) hates Sarah Palin?

I expect I can add that question to the miles-long list of questions to which Obama will never provide a satisfactory answer. I expect I can add that question to the miles-long list of questions about which Obama doesn’t care.

–Ben Crystal

Ready For Hillary

In the event that you live under a rock, have been trapped under something really heavy or are only just now returning from an all-expenses-paid, 5-star, 17-day getaway in a tropical paradise, I bring news. Hillary Clinton is officially running for President of the United States. Despite a resume that sports holes bigger than her Benghazi testimony, a 2008 Presidential bid that birthed the “birther” stories about now-President Barack Obama and a central role in one of the biggest foreign policy disasters ever to be denied by the Democrats, Madame Clinton is already the presumptive front-runner for the Democratic Party’s nod to handle the sizable cleanup job that will fall directly into Obama’s successor’s lap.

And the former Lady MacBeth of Little Rock is poised to continue her outstanding record of championing the cause of women everywhere.  Well, maybe not women everywhere. Women who struggle to lie convincingly under oath, think “it” makes a big difference, achieved notability without riding the coattails of a disbarred chubby-chaser and/or look like ladies need not apply.

And Hillary isn’t going to miss a chance to let her impressive accomplishments speak for themselves. She’s even offering collectibles. Want to book an early ticket on the Hillary 2016 campaign train? Let your friends know you’re all aboard with Hillary swag! There are “Ready for Hillary” bumper stickers. Slap one on your bailout-mobile today! If that bailout-mobile is a Chevy Volt, I’d recommend doing it right away; the stickers are not fireproof. If you’re looking for a handy-dandy vessel for your organically grown, cruelty-free, fair-trade, half-caff, triple soy latte, look no further than the Ready for Hillary Twitter Mug! Made (no doubt) from recycled hipster eyeglass frames with Libyan sand as an aggregate, the RFHTM (now that’s an acronym) comes emblazoned with the RFH logo, a picture of The Candidate getting outsmarted by a smartphone and even her curriculum vitae — lest you forget that Hillary Clinton was once considered a “hair icon.”

I don’t know about the rest of you. But, clearly, any man who thinks that being married to the Governor of Arkansas — the “FLOAR” item — isn’t qualification enough to answer the “red” phone at 3 a.m. must be fighting a war on women.

But Hillary is going to have to move some serious merchandise if she’s hoping to advance past the opening rounds of the 2016 Presidential tournament. While her own party’s nomination might be all but sewn up, the actual election is far from assured. Even against the backdrop of the so-called “Bridgegate” scandal, CNN’s latest 2016 Presidential poll shows Hillary losing to her barely more-conservative counterpart, New Jersey Governor Chris Christie.

And even without a clear front-runner on the opposite side, Hillary doesn’t exactly ring the electorate’s bells. According to a new poll by YouGov.com, Hillary is only the 10th most admired person in America.  Not only does she trail the top vote-getter, committed pro-lifer Pope Francis I, she trails former President George W. Bush. In fact, poor Candidate Hillary finished the poll staring at the prominent backside of talk radio host Rush Limbaugh — although, to be fair, Limbaugh is far more popular among Americans than Hillary. In a final insult, the man who can claim credit for pretty much every notch on Hillary’s career belt since the early 1970s — her husband and former President, Bill Clinton — finished well ahead of her, meaning that Americans prefer a sex-obsessed, disbarred perjurer to his shrieking harpy of a wife.

Granted, election 2016 is still a fair stretch into the future. There’s plenty of time for a conservative to emerge as a candidate who actually wants to unify the Nation torn asunder by Obama’s and Hillary’s incredibly divisive tenure. There’s also plenty of time for Hillary to get tangled up in another scandal. Hell, by this time next year, with more than 20 months still to go until the big dance, we might be discussing Hillary’s chances of clawing her way onto Vice President Joe Biden’s ticket.

At least she’ll have that coffee mug in which she can drown her sorrows.

–Ben Crystal

Dear Media:

Thanks. Seriously, from the bottom of my heart, I offer to you my most profound gratitude. It took New Jersey Governor Chris Christie channeling the ghost of Tony Soprano to get you guys to come out against government corruption, but I’m not going to complain. Clearly, your intent in shrieking to the rafters about Christie’s politically motivated (by staffers, at least) cannonball into the deep end of the scandal pool stems entirely from a newfound belief that executives’ abusing their authority is beyond the pale, right?

Granted, pegging Christie for his involvement in a scheme to alter traffic patterns might not rise to the level of on-the-spot reporting about the corruption inherent in selling guns to narcoterrorists and then perjuring yourself in front of Congress about it; but it’s a start.

I’ll concede that sounding the alarm over a potential Presidential candidate getting tangled in inconveniencing commuters is no substitute for sounding the alarm over a President’s decision to abandon four citizens in some Libyan hellhole, but it’s a bit closer to actual journalism than the Democrats’ media normally wander.

Shouting across the rooftops of the world over gubernatorial meddling with one of the three driving routes between New Jersey and New York won’t un-tell all the lies we were fed over the multitrillion-dollar fraud still masquerading as Obamacare, but it beats cutting the story for a fun kicker about a singing cat.

And though giving the media version of a proctology exam to a political plan to turn the George Washington Bridge into an instant parking lot doesn’t reveal a disease as severe as a Presidential plan to turn the Internal Revenue Service and the National Security Agency into an Orwellian nightmare, it’s still a diagnosis — albeit as worthwhile as a chiropractic “adjustment” on a corpse.

Listen, I know it’s tough for you guys. You have to hear about scandals from someone who is actually paying attention. Then, you have to determine whether the scandal will affect the political elite for whom you work. Then, you have to find out how they want the story covered, if at all. And — with notably few exceptions — you have to rely on the starry-eyed neophytes, self-important hacks and/or talking hairdos to actually report the story. So maybe you missed a few major scandals that might normally have sent a Presidency to the bottom of a Hawaiian lagoon (covertly selling guns to al-Qaida within a year or two of whacking its leader comes to mind); you’re a bunch of epileptic Neanderthals trying to conduct surgery in the Superdome. At least you’re trying, right?

Now, I know some people think you’re only gnawing on Christie’s “bridgegate” scandal because the Democrats hope “bridgegate” will sink Christie’s alleged Presidential campaign before he can steer it out of the harbor. If they’re right, then you media types are nothing more than paid button men for the Democratic crime family. Given that Christie is the political equivalent of Hillary Clinton in a slightly less-well-tailored pantsuit, I’m actually fine with that, as well.

–Ben Crystal

Mom Knows Best

Like any good son, I call my mother every week. I sit through the usual litany of complaints about how I don’t call enough, I don’t visit enough, three dogs are a poor substitute for even one grandchild, and my brother’s kids are perfect but that doesn’t mean that I’m off the hook and she’s not getting any younger, you know, and it would be nice to have one more baby to play with before she’s too old to enjoy it and by the way, I’m not getting any younger, either.

Sometimes, Mom gives me both barrels. Take last Sunday. Following the aforementioned golden oldies, Mom turned to a topic that disappoints her more than I ever could have: politicians. She bemoaned new New York City Mayor Bill De Blasio’s bizarre inauguration, surmising it might have been the most embarrassing few hours of television in history. “You can count the seconds until someone hints at redistributing wealth,” said Mom. I murmured my assent, blundering into her trap. “If you agree, then why don’t you say more about it?” she asked. “In fact, there’s a lot about (President Barack) Obama you could say, but don’t.”

She’s right. All right, Mom. Here you go:

Obamacare is the biggest fraud in human history. You just can’t say that enough. The lone benefit Obamacare actually offers is that it reveals the Democrats’ absolute obedience to politics over people. Obama has lied about virtually everything related to his signature “achievement.” Yet the Democrats are still desperately trying to impose it on a Nation that never wanted it to begin with. Imagine if Bernie Madoff had had the Internal Revenue Service on his payroll, forcing unwilling victims into his scam at gunpoint while exempting his accomplices. That’s Obamacare.

The Obamacare disaster is just getting started. Just less than a year from now, the so-called “employer mandate” delay will expire. Even with enrollment figures dramatically lower than promised, Obamacare fell on its face at the starting line like its shoes were tied together. Imagine the hijinks come this time next year, when a few million new victims are forced into the queue.

Obama’s friends are serious creeps. Granted, everyone has a friend or relative who makes them cringe from time to time. I’m willing to acknowledge that I’m probably that guy for a couple of folks. But I can’t help but notice that Obama doesn’t appear to have any associates who don’t give even the moodiest loner ever to buy a black overcoat a case of the willies. Of course, there’s homicidal terrorist Bill Ayers, racist flamethrower Jeremiah Wright and whichever ACORN thugs missed the audition for Jerry Springer’s next pay-per-view extravaganza. But there’s also his big-dollar bundler and current prison inmate Tony Rezko, Islamofascist and terrorist sympathizer Ingrid Mattson, convicted check-kiter and Illinois Democrat heavyweight Robert Creamer, head Service Employees International Union thug Andy Stern and even Charles Manson superfan Bernadine Dohrn. There are movie villains who hang out with less spooky sidekicks.

Under Obama, the United States is a state sponsor of terrorism. Remember last year, when Russian President Vladimir Putin turned Obama into punching bag over Syria? Well, what disappeared behind the bear’s brutal beatdown of Barry O. was the origin of some of the weapons being wielded by the Islamofascists fighting to take control of Syria from other Islamofascists. President Peace Prize took the U.S. from 9/11 to selling guns to al-Qaida in just more than a decade. Some of the weapons the al-Qaida-linked Syrians are playing with came from a U.S. controlled stash in Benghazi, Libya. No wonder the Benghazi victims’ pleas for help were ignored. Must have coincided with a shipment date.

Obama and his minions are inveterate liars. These guys seriously make the Freemasons look like Wikipedia. What happened to his promise of transparency? We’ll have to pass it to see what’s in it. We can keep our doctors/plans/lives. Pretty much everything Attorney General Eric Holder has ever said out loud. Pretty much everything Secretary of Health and Human Services Kathleen Sebelius has ever said out loud. Pretty much everything White House Press Secretary Jay Carney has ever said out loud. I’m still waiting for someone to tell us what exactly Obama was doing while the Benghazi Four were being murdered and why exactly the Benghazi Four weren’t rescued. Maybe we can find the answers we’re looking for on YouTube.

Of course, this list could be much, much longer. I hope you’re happy, Mom.

–Ben Crystal