Armed And Serious
January 17, 2013 by Ben Crystal
I’m going to open today’s remarks with an act of contrition. In Tuesday’s column, I identified the M1 Garand as having a 10-round capacity. A number of you pointed out that that weapon’s capacity is eight. You were right, and I was wrong. In watching gun-grabbing general Piers Morgan’s daily self-embarrassments, I watched a liberal refusing to acknowledge his ignorance despite irrefutable proof that he had his head wedged so far up his overbred British rectum that he could see the scones he had for teatime. I can admit when I missed the bull’s-eye. Working with the gang here at the Personal Liberty Digest™ is a source of real pride. Working for a sharp, intelligent readership is even more so. I’m so inspired by you that I’m going to take a break and watch some “Band of Brothers” clips on YouTube.
In recent days, I’ve noticed an increase in the chatter regarding a planned “Gun Appreciation Day.” Promoted by Larry Ward and his pro-Bill of Rights group Political Media, Inc., the observance is scheduled for Saturday and is fairly self-explanatory. It’s a chance for firearms enthusiasts to cheer the 2nd Amendment and thumb their collective noses at President Barack Obama, his liberal accomplices and their assault on our rights — all without missing a day of working to cover the Democratic voters’ Obamaphone bills.
Gun Appreciation Day: It’s a sentiment with which I can agree, in a general sense. But count me out of those who will tweet, hashtag or Facebook post my support. It’s not that I don’t recognize that a day spent at the range is every bit as worthwhile in a Constitutional sense as a few moments of watching Piers Morgan beclown himself. But observing Gun Appreciation Day strikes me as a bit on the juvenile side. It’s almost as if the celebrants will be throwing an exceptionally noisy tantrum. It also undersells the importance of the central issue: making private firearm ownership a bone of contention instead of the symbol of American unity it should be. Moreover, every day is as much Gun Appreciation Day as it is Free Speech Appreciation Day or States’ Rights Appreciation Day. As an aside, notice all three would be conspicuously absent from a liberal calendar. I celebrate each time I take my AR-15 (affectionately known as the “M4-gery”) to the nearby outdoor range, pen a column about Obama’s crimes or vote for a candidate whom I believe to be the least likely to threaten to stop me from doing either. Think of it this way: Planned Parenthood, which kills an exponentially higher number of Americans each year than all the gun owners in the country could even imagine, doesn’t celebrate its taxpayer-funded massacres with a big, annual shindig. It’s too busy providing – ahem — women’s healthcare.
One of the things that has always gratified me about the pro-Bill of Rights side is the intellectual sanity we dispense in the face of an endless stream of brainless invective from the other side. While sock puppets like Morgan humiliate themselves by dismissing the Constitution itself as “your little book,” Constitutionalists respond by systematically dismantling every aspect of the gun grabbers’ agenda with the same Constitution that Morgan foolishly dismissed.
Sometime after this column makes its way to Bob Livingston’s electronic in-box, Obama is going to announce a fascist end run around the 2nd Amendment, the separation of powers and common sense. During the speech (in which he will claim imperial prerogative in abrogating the Bill of Rights without having even approached proving the necessity of such a move), he will be surrounded by passel of fresh-faced kiddies. The little moppets will fill the role of stage props for Obama’s liberal dog and pony show. Exploiting children to sell a plan to violate their civil rights in perpetuity repulses me, as it should anyone with even a shred of decency.
That’s the sort of political theatricality conservatives eschew in favor of real logic. I don’t want the people on the side of the Bill of Rights to behave like a bunch of unbathed trust-fund babies at some Occupy rally. We have the weight of history on our side. Armed with that knowledge, we should be the serious ones in this political war. Then again, Saturday at the range does sound like a fine idea — even one I can seriously appreciate.