The Grass Really Is Greener
June 3, 2011 by Chip Wood
*The grass really is greener. We’re just back from a family wedding in Worthington, Ohio, one of the Buckeye State’s beautiful small towns. And you know what? The grass really is greener there than it is in north Florida. It smells better when it’s freshly mown. And it feels better when you walk on it. I love a lot about the low country, but not the St. Augustine grass.
*The smell of summer. I admit it; if it weren’t for the fact that I love many of our creature comforts, I’d make a great beach bum. My favorite form of “exercise” is taking long walks on the beach. I love to watch the waves and smell the ocean. Two special treats are seeing the dolphins go by and watching the endless entertainment of pelicans dive-bombing the water. It’s funny, but all it takes is a sniff of suntan lotion, especially Coppertone®, to bring all those memories flooding back.
*Government can’t even get this right? Someday, I’m going to write a column about how outrageous it is for government to sponsor gambling to raise money for schools. I can think of few things worse at teaching people to hope for something for nothing — and taking from those who can least afford it — than state-sponsored lotteries. But at least the darn things are profitable. So would someone please explain how the bureaucrats in New York bungled Off-Track Betting so badly that it had to declare bankruptcy? Losing money when you have a monopoly on gambling; now, that’s really incompetent.
*This just ain’t right, either. Speaking of something that’s not right, have you heard about the latest fad among some dog owners? It’s coming up with a new breed. Cross a cocker spaniel with a poodle, I’m told, and you get a cockapoo. Breed a schnauzer with a poodle and you’ll get — do you really want to know? — a schnoodle. And maybe my least favorite is the blend of a beagle and a Pekinese. Anyone want a Peagle? Reminds me of that long-ago commercial that said, “It’s not nice to fool Mother Nature.”